musings of Munich

what a lucky lucky girl I am.  i had another opportunity to travel with The Mr. this past summer.  I can't believe i'm just now getting to writing about it.

The Mr. spent 2 weeks in Munich for work, and i got to join in on the end of his stint.  we had a long weekend together and had a great time.

my fabulous sister came & stayed with the bean a day early so i could change my flight.  turned out we got to watch the US/Germany game play in the World Cup in the Olympic Stadium.  yes it was as awesome as that sounds.  i think the only thing cooler than that would have been had we been in brazil.

my first taste of german food was quite authentic.  first we got a pretzel.  then we got a brat & beer at the game.  we were all decked out in our RedWhite&Blue.  and, even though we lost, it was a great game!  the only downside were the few random jerks who actually had the nerve to Boo! the national anthem.

the next day The Mr. had to work but walked me to a nearby lake & i had lunch and read my book awhile.  we walked to dinner in downtown Unterschleishem at a yummy Indian restaurant & got ice cream afterwards.

saturday we spent the day in Munich center.  walked around Marienplatz & sat at the biergarten in Englischer Garten for most of the day.  it took that long to nurse the giant beers we had.

glockenspiel

sunday we got on a train and went to Salzburg.  it was lovely! my first authentic train experience. sadly it rained the whole 24hrs we were there.  but still got to see that Salzburg is quite charming.  i will go back someday in the sun.  after much debate, we decided to go ahead and take the tram up to Untersberg even though it was rainy/foggy.  we were so glad we did. it was a fun(ny) experience. 

finally!  a speck of sun.  too bad this is on our way out...

Untersberg

actual view from tram going up the Alp.  Not to be confused with our Santa Barbara view

back to Munich on Monday to leave on Tuesday.  it was a whirlwind for sure.  i didn't mind.  we came back in time to do 4th of July & bean's birthday.  a relaxing july was had; and school is now back in session!

i look forward to the next opportunity i'll have to take advantage of The Mr.'s free miles!

ramblings

oh so much mulling in my mind......

....we had a completely marvelous spring break!  TN was awesome.  everyone enjoyed each other for the most part.  except for watching a very distressing/realistic depiction of *something* in season 3 of Downton Abbey & a couple of moments from the bean, it was perfect!

....i can't wait for the next state! we (i) haven't planned where we're going this summer yet.  but we'll definitely do something.  i have a map in our bonus room that i'm coloring in as we go.  unfortunately, it's not working out as i planned.  i had hoped to go see my friend that moved to AR this past summer.  when i saw where she was, i see she's on the edge so that woulda given us an opportunity to see 3 states!  however, sadly we just aren't friends anymore.  once she left she left.  it breaks my heart but i can't constantly reach out only to be left hanging.  she warned me she's like that.  i just didn't think she'd be like that with me.

.... i just dropped the bean off at school (!!!) and i had that typical cliche moment where she looked back at me.  and yeah.  cliche abound.  that shit really does get to you.

....The Mr. & i watched the NCAA basketball championship.... ie "pick'ems"  we had a wager on it.  it was the most exciting set of games we've seen probably ever.  it was fun! and as down to the wire most of those games were, our brackets were too and The Mr. won by 2pts.  now i have to watch an episode of the ever stupid "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia".   used to watch that show with him; then i realized i'm not a 10 year old boy.

...have intended to write posts on Dr. New Guy and meds and all....  the short of it is i am off all meds right now (and have been for about 2 months). 
he upped what was working for me. but that wasn't working for me.  so he took me off & said take a break for about a month with intention of starting #4 (!!).  i could also go back to #3 first dose if i wanted.
i don't know what i want.
i was dealing with some other major issues & feel i handled it well- unmedicated.  so now i don't know i don't know i don't know.

...our winter is over- though every time i go to weather.com i see the red warning headline that SOMEONE out there is expecting 12" snow again.  we had 2 "snows", along with those "cold" days.
the day before Easter was cloudy, dark, rainy & cold.  i couldn't believe it was actually Easter.  however, wake up sunday and it was our typical spring lovely.

...& the night before Easter, The Mr. & i went to see Lion King at the Fox.
i'm sad to say that it wasn't as astoundingly wonderful as i'd been told/hoped/thought.
yes it was a good night out.  yes the costumes were innovative.  but, i don't know.  it was just not the oomph we had hoped for.
same with Book of Mormon. 
[those 2 shows alone are what drove us to buy season tickets]
to be fair, Lion King isn't my all-time-fave anyway.  i have probably only seen it 2ce; and not in ages.

...however we decided we will bring the bean to The Little Mermaid on her birthday this year (great timing!) and that is one of my fave disney shows. i hope this one will be better!

...it's been a year since i got to go to Utah and boy am i frustrated.  i have instilled a pact w/ my 2 friends to spur us all on. and for some reason it's just not working for me.  even on my really really good days i'm not moving the scale (in the right direction) very much.  zaps my motivation for sure.  along with that month i was dealing with all the other stuff. i just can't focus.
really wish i could get my motivation back (meds??) because THIS is as much vacation as i'm gonna have this year.... 6 hours of school each day.  and that is quickly winding down.

okay- i guess i should be done rambling for now.  hope to be back with a proper post soon.

2 weeks ago

i can't believe just 2 weeks ago, i was in another country.
i had the coolest opportunity to visit The Mr. while he was in Ireland for 2 weeks.  it also happened that the weekend i went to visit him was Bank Holiday, so we had 3 whole days together.  he only had to check on work a couple of times.
it was wonderful.

we went to dublin.  and 2 weeks ago today we took a side-trip to nearby Howth.  a quaint fishing village with some spectacular views (and a castle, to boot!)

so glad we took the day to walk up and down and all around this place.  it was the best way for us to see how we all have pictured Ireland.  rolling green hills, castles, water, blue sky....   it was awesome.
the weather was beautiful, even though it did rain a little each day (except the last day) and that just made it more authentic.
coming from georgia at 90+d weather, it was awesome to be somewhere where it was a cool 70.
(although at this very moment, georgia is setting record lows because it is in the 70s here now.  mid-august.  unheard of!!)

we saw Riverdance.  on a whim.  and we are both so so glad we did.  i had no idea it would be like that.  even The Mr. who is not as fond of musicals and performances as i am really enjoyed it.  i came home and showed some of it to the bean from youtube.  that didn't do it justice, but still very awesome.

it was a wonderful trip.  so glad it worked out with all the scheduling.  because then i came home (he followed a few days later) and the next day we had meet the teacher, then monday was school!!
we spent time meandering the streets, seeing the sites, pubbing the pubs, sleeping in (!!) and just enjoying each other's company.
The Mr. has been doing a ton of travel this year, so it was great to finally talk to him uninterrupted.

here are a few of my pictures:
these are all from Howth.

 

these are from dublin:

this was my view from a cafe where we ate lunch

Christ Church Cathedral;  

I couldn't get over that this was built in the 1200's.  200 years before my country was even "discovered".  I had to go and touch it.  also loved that the road went right through it.

St. Patrick's Cathedral

we spent some time hanging out on the green.

and we also liked spending time on St. Stephen's Green, a park in downtown Dublin.  a gentleman who talked to me while i was waiting for The Mr. referred to it as "The Queen's Park"

 

what a lovely time we had.

new goals

the fitness retreat was a good thing for a few reasons.
1.  "vacation" from life

no- of course it wasn't exactly a vacation.  which i would likely define as sleeping late, eating scrumptiously, touring new places and/or relaxing.        okay so it was NONE of that.... well, it was ONE of that.  and it was the fact i didn't have to think of anything at all. so in some respects it WAS a vacation, i guess.  i didn't plan for anything.  or cook. or clean. or cut up anyone's food. or feed any cats.

2.   giving me a jump start (tiny) on being healthy

although i didn't lose a ton of weight in that week, i did manage to lose a few more pounds once i got home.  i've been pretty stable this past week; but in all honesty, this past week was a lot less what i wanted out of it with different ailments that came my way and some frustrations that sucked my motivation. 

3.  makes me think twice about pushing myself or eating better

yesterday my 1/2 sandwich and salad (!) came with fries.  of which i ate TWO.  that's not like me.   and i only ate those 2 fries because i could, and to see if i would care.  (i didn't).
i have had such little sugar since i've come home.  i only went to starbucks for a mocha (nonfat; light whip) the other day b/c quite frankly not much was going right that day and i wanted SOMETHING.
my friend ate a full-sized snickers in front of me, and i didn't care at all.  i have a lot more willpower than i woulda thought.
[confession:  i did have a small brownie the other day- but even so doing that- i was in all my limits for calorie/fat intake etc]
i ran with my friend on a 10k trail.  we had a little walk warm up.  and we ran 2 miles.  then i walked a little more and ran another 2 1/2 miles.  that is not like me. 
truthfully, though, it was just one of those really good runs.  the weather and my body were cooperating together.  it was "easy" enough.  if i didn't psyche my brain about the tunnels that were coming up- i prob'ly could've even run more.

4.  showed me a new and gorgeous place to travel!

Salt Lake City is pretty gorgeous y'all:

snowshoeing! at Mill Creek Canyon

walked 8 miles! at City Creek Canyon

hiked 6 miles up a different part of Mill Creek Canyon

and i've never seen this much snow:

at Snowbird Resort (easy day)

so now i have a new life goal!
i will do my best to make sure littlegirl (and ME of course) gets to travel to every state.
and i can't wait for that to begin!

although we all went to Florida last summer, we're getting ready to go back in a few weeks and that will be very vacation like.

lucky girl

greetings from Salt Lake City, Utah!
i keep reminding myself to enjoy every minute of it because not many people have a Mr. like mine. 
he is going to find out even more of what i go thru while he travels extensively for his job.  because he will have little girl for much longer (almost double on a normal week) than i do;  and he is also going to be working his job for the most part of it.

i have tremendous friends that are helping out one day b/c he has a meeting to get to.

i am currently looking out of my hotel window with a view of a mountain.  not too shabby.
and when i go to the other side of the hotel where the elevator is, i see gorgeous snow-covered mountains over there, too!

i happen to be here on the weekend of the large conference the Mormons hold.  my friend Christina liked my term i used for my adventures into the city last night.  "swarmon"  as in swarming mormons.  so while i was trying to find a place to eat before my retreat officially starts with orientation tonight, so were all the many people of LDS faith.  also passed a few other people who wanted to antagonize the LDS belief system.

i have today to putz around.  reading in bed & watching a movie in a theater is in my agenda!!  wow!  and tomorrow, at 6am (bright eyed and bushy-tailed optional), i will begin my time here where i can only imagine how exhausted i will feel at the end of each day.

i'm so fortunate that The Mr. has allowed me to take a vacation from life! 
i'm very hopeful for the outcome.

still supportive

i have documented numerous times in the past how supportive The Mr. has been of me. 
from accepting i didn't want to have kids & loving me anyway, to allowing me to quit a perfectly fine job to hope for something new to come along, to many other times in our 18years together.

his support is the reason we have the little bean now.  it's the reason i was able to work for a company that means something to me.  it's the reason we have been able to build our life together and allow me to stay home with our little girl.

he deals with (somehow) all of the darkness i bring to the table.  he allows me to be social even though he would rather not be.  i have girls night aplenty while he's gone.  and even this past week he didn't mind that he came home to a Mary Kay party in progress.

and his support continues.
he didn't bat an eye when i asked if i can take off for a week.
he never questioned it and said "go. i'll figure it out" in regards to his crazy work schedule, and getting his parents to come help out because of said work schedule.

so, i am happy to report that in early april i will be working my ass off here! i will be having nutrition classes, life coaching, daily constant exercise PLUS 12 weeks (that's THREE MONTHS) of long-distance coaching... all thanks to Unite Fitness & The Mr.  [to be clear- Unite Fitness is not providing me with anything other than the place to do it.  The Mr. is providing the cash & the time].

so though i will have a vacation from life- i assure you it will not be a "vacation".  i also plan to bring my self-help reading material.  not that i will be able to function enough to work on myself.  but i guess i need to do all i can do to combat all that i feel on a constant daily basis.

i'm especially excited the retreat is in salt lake city.  the 2 layovers i've had there have amazed me to no end.  seeing the large expanse of mountains (not even the rockies!!) have enthralled me each time.  i cannot wait to be right there in the thick of it!

i have a LOT of work to do between now and then.
i can't wait!
i really hope i can come home as someone worthy of such unfailing support.
to The Mr.  Thank you.  for this.....  and all!

ups and downs

pretty sure everyone can relate to that.
ups and downs.

sometimes it's the easiest (tiniest) thing that turns me into down.
it's harder to get me into up.

why the hell is that?

and the funny thing....  i'm one of the most optimistic people i know.  pleasant, friendly, outgoing.
to everyone else.

i will say, the fog is lifting.
went on vacation last week.  THAT helped.

this is an actual picture of my vacation:    true story.

there's more pictures where that came from.  most of them actually look less like the fog surrounding the quaint city of Santa Barbara.
if you feel inclined, go look.
visitors make me happy.  comments make me happy. 
vacations make me really happy.

looking forward to planning the next one.
bonus points if i am indeed out of all this fog and downs.  i got one year. 
get my ass in gear!

through the trees

my BFF & i went for our 3rd annual girls' trip weekend over a week ago.  we had a blast in Asheville, NC.  

we stayed at the swanky Hotel Indigo, ate some yummy food, had great adult conversations (and beverages) without interruptions.  had the best massages either of us have ever had before at Sensibilities Day Spa, a nice ride up the blueridge parkway to Mt. Pisgah.

however, the whole weekend was kicked off in style by flying through the trees at Navitat.

if you hold your computer (or neck) sideways, this is the most decent video i was able to take.  i had my camera strapped to all my gear, so it was flying willy-nilly.... as was i.

i recommend it!  it was scaryhellfun.

in fact, The Mr. and i are definitely considering adding the Wrightwood CA location to our trip we're taking in the fall.

handling some chaos

i've been lax in posting, because the past couple of weeks have been busy.
we planned, packed for, and took a vacation (sans Bean!) and this week was spent getting back into routines & other stuff.

so it dawned on me over the course of the last week or so that i needed to update things.

since i've last posted, i'd been busy organizing the trip which included leaving the bean in a different state with my sister who doesn't have many kid-sized things. (turns out, she didn't use much of the toys or any of the food items i brought. the kitchen items, i think were appreciated)

we also had our friends over for grilling out & swimming. that night, The Mr. burned his fingertips on the grilled potato foil pouch. (OUCH. poor guy!)
meanwhile, he had also played soccer the tuesday before (the day, actually, that i posted) and got elbowed pretty good in the back. i think he casually mentioned this to me a few days later on thursday.
saturday (the day we had company) he decided to run most of his normal 6+mile route. except, this time, his back hurt him greatly, so he walked home.
didn't make a big deal of it (of course!) and proceeded to do ALL of the yardwork, including weeding & cutting the bushes (thus lots of bending)

... y'all, i had no idea he was going that far with the yard work, i swear!

sunday he ran again (with the burned fingers) & came home and said his back was super sore. all day long. yet, he insisted on playing with the bean in the pool..... holding her the whole time. in the deep end. swimming, holding her, & letting her balance by holding on to the diving board.
insisted!

sunday night he even got out of bed to get the bean when she needed to go potty. i was completely unaware, and quite annoyed when i found out later that i was not called upon to help.

in any case, 4:30 am rolls around and The Mr. (poor guy!) is in complete and utter pain. i'd never seen him like that before! not even when he got hit while riding his bike, and he has the "shark bite" gash in his leg to show for it.
i asked if he would please PLEASE go to a doctor afterall! he (finally) conceded. so i asked if we should go now. of course, his reply was "no"
that reply quickly changed not 10 minutes later when he had no choice.

i guess he preferred to go to the ER in style via a 911 call! we joke about it now, but no. that indeed was not funny- when he passed out! was the most horrendous 45 seconds of my life. (and possibly his?) and that includes one hellish labor story!

[i'd like to interrupt this drama by remarking how AMAZING amazing our 3yo little girl is! the girl who used to wake up when The Mr. walked upstairs slept through all of the yelling (pain), screaming (fear), panicked phone call, several trips downstairs to gather items, 5 big men coming upstairs in less-than-quiet fashion (including taking a cellphone call outside of her bedroom door!), walking The Mr. down & strapping him to a loud jostly gurney!!]

ok. so i guess i didn't interrupt the drama, but just spilled it all to you.
oh, and this all occured the day before taking our much anticipated, long awaited vacation.

golden!

so monday was spent shuttling back and forth & just general dealing with all that comes from a 911 call at 5am. we debated about the vacation, and ultimately decided to go.
sure, it changed some of our plans (like bike rides & hiking), but it would still be a vacation, which is the important part of the idea!

the vacation was not without it's own mini-chaos. we spent the first 1/2 worried about the condition of The Mr.'s back pain & the second 1/2 wondering about getting home. our flight was via JFK in NYC, which even though we had the foresight to cut our vacay a little short & go on an earlier flight, obv, that all changed when NYC shut down a day early.

i am so terribly sorry for the devastation that hurricane Irene caused in NC & New England! it is truly unbelievable to see all the flooding in VT & hear about all the power outages along the eastern seabord.

our vacation was actually spent in VT & we spent one night in Montreal. i kept the whole thing in stride, knowing that THIS problem wasn't really all that bad considering we weren't in the eye of the hurricane! (not yet anyway)
as we all know, the storm lessened after it gave NC a big beating. (my niece's college and apartment was pretty torn up in the whole event, though i haven't heard about all the actual damage). i figured if we can't get out Til Tuesday (hush hush) then we'd just have bonus vacation, and i would worry about being huddled scared in a hotel basement when it comes barreling to VT later.

of course, that's not how things ended up. once NYC shut down, we really figured that no, we couldn't just stay and hang out in a storm situation for extra days just for "fun". so we dealt with a lot of old PRTM majors trying to take us tourists back home. some were more helpful/understanding than others. it took both The Mr. & my bright ideas combined to ultimately decide that from montreal we were going to leave our luggage at the now over-booked hotel, drive back to VT to return our rental car (thanks a lot, "Thrafty"!), take their shuttle to the airport, hang out for a few hours, buy (what appeared to be the very last) 2 tickets on greyhound and go immediately BACK to canada to walk to get our luggage & take a taxi to the (incredibly awesome) marriott attached to the airport so we could fly out of montreal the next morning.

hindsight is great. because 3 of the 3 alternative flights we had booked in the course of all this were either canceled or delayed 3+ hours.

i kinda sound like a douche whining about this, when i know many people were actually affected by the hurricane! i know it was frustrating, but i'm very thankful that it was never horrifying. (not like the 45 seconds before all the vacation began!)

so, i guess my meds are holding up. i'm not sure what it would've changed if i hadn't been on them. but we dealt with what the most chaotic/dramatic week we'd experienced thusfar. but even in my most depressive days, i usually can keep things in perspective. i always recognize that many many people have things far worse off! & i can usually find something to be thankful about regarding my situation(s).
it always makes me feel so GD selfish for being "depressed" at all.

#88 explained

to continue with further explanations (ie: a post idea!)
here's where i give the background of our engagement. (#88 in my 100)

i really never thought The Mr. could surprise me with an engagement. i know that makes no sense, especially now seeing how many surprises he's kept since then.

we had been living together for a year. so i knew that being together all the time would kinda ruin the whole "hey, why not get all fancied up for no reason, no reason at all, but let's go to some place extra special just because" proposal. i mean, really. we aren't the type to just regularly have nice dinners in ATL all the time.

let's rewind a little.
moving in with The Mr. was SUCH a huge deal for me. i really didn't want to, but saw many reasons why i should. it's the catholic guilt & moreso the potter guilt that went with my having to tell my parents that *gack* i'm gonna move in with him.
[and, no. that didn't go very well. but it didn't end our lives or anything, so...]

however, after being together already for 5 1/2 years, i was kinda scared of the whole "why buy the milk....." i remember the night before he hauled my stuff to GA i cried to him & made him promise that he had intentions of marrying me at some point. otherwise, i just didn't think it would make any sense.

of course he did.

so i promised myself that i would right then and there NOT discuss anything having to do with the m word (or the w word) for at least a year. let him do things on his own. i knew his plan was working out. he had wanted to graduate, go to grad school, have a job & establish himself before he'd propose. so i was giving him time to do that.

and i did great!
took weddings and marriage out of my mind. lived our life, blahblahblah.

then it was time to plan a vacation. we were going to go to michigan to see where he was born/lived up until 7th grade. he was raised in detroit, and had family in some areas around there. so we made a vacation out of seeing his haunts in detroit, see family, and travel up to see the sand dunes (abso-f-ing-lutely amazing!) & macinac island, and all kindsa fantastic places en route. it truly was an awesome trip that i still remember fondly. i highly recommend it!

it was right before that trip that i started to have inklings creep into my brain. mainly b/c my friends came to visit us, and i was having a convo with tom about how i just didn't think it would be happening anytime soon. (The Mr. was asleep, so i wasn't hinting here). he predicted it would happen on our trip. he even gave a date. (july 17th)

but really, i wasn't harping on it at all.
until we got there. and not one set, but 2 of the 3 sets of family we saw began to question ME about why we aren't engaged.... more than once.
each time, i answered an appropriate: "ask him!" (they didn't).

and yeah, it came to mind on the 17th. and maybe 2 other times where it was OH SO ROMANTIC.... this would be perfect, pleasepleasepleaseplease.....

the last thing we did there was to go back to his grandmother's. and she lives out in nothingplace. (coincidentally awfully close to tom's small town which i asked her to take us to so i could see the brand new [only] stoplight!)
so on the way back from nothingplace to detroit to catch our flight, we had time to talk. where i told The Mr. that grandma has been asking about the future of us.... both times we saw her. more than once.... hint. hint. let's talk.

so whatever. we talked.
but by then the cat was out of the bag. and i become, um.... rather obsessive. once i get goin, it's hard to stop me. so of course all week long i thought and thought and mulled and cried and fussed about when and whynot and when!?!

i kept bringing it up. and The Mr. would respond. at one point he even said something cryptic (hi! hindsight... i see you now) about maybe by sunday he will be able to tell me how he's feeling.

finally, i'd had ENOUGH of the talk and the thoughts and the sleeplessness and the crabbiness. on that friday i had told my friend on the phone "i'm done. i'd rather be with him and not married than to be without him. so it's fine if he's not ready. i'm done with the obsessing"

friday night- we were engaged!

i'd like to go to....

in no particular order:

1. switzerland
2. italy
3. california - drive up the coast
4. niagra falls
5. canada
6. cruise
7. martha's vineyard
8. nantucket
9. maine
10. sequoia nat'l forest
11. fancy spa
12. girls' trip to vegas
13. provence, france

hmmmm, guess i have to stop now. it's not the thursday 30. ......

i've been to.....

not quite a complete list...

1. london (9th grade band trip)
2. indianapolis- i've marched in the hoosier dome!
3. new orleans (12th grade band trip)
4. disney/universal florida (several times, first 2 w/ band)
5. NYC (same as above)
6. DC (same as above)
7. Phoenix (i'm still in awe that there are mountains in dem dare hills!!! you know, bugs bunny does NOT show that)
8. jamaica (celebrate 1st year teaching)
9. paris (honeymoon---- blissful in september!)
10. vegas (for a wedding)
11. hawaii (3rd anniversary)
12. rocky point, mexico (for a wedding)
13. denver (rocky mountains--- AMAZING)