Wednesday, October 2, 2013

day whatever

so much for my quest for documenting my new meds....
well, i guess i kinda suck at it.

i have been on a full dose for the better part of 2 weeks.

the short of it is i have had a few (much smaller) bouts of oddity going on.
this type of stuff has plagued me my whole life, and it's quite frustrating. nothing major happens; and anything that is major i fail to be able to describe.
the only thing i can ever say in those moments is "i don't feel right"
vague, much?

so lately, i have little single instances of a woozy feeling.  i'm not sure i would classify that in the "dizzy" category of the side effects.  to me, dizzy sounds like a constant -vertigo-feeling (which sucks so bad!).
every once in awhile, i have felt the world just turn upside down.  or move below my feet.  or some odd thing like that.  but then it's over.  in those times i try to be conscious of any anxiety and tell myself not to get a panic attack.  (is that something you can even control?  i don't know).

The Mr. was home last week. and though that helped he wasn't on the other side of the world, i still don't feel any differently.  i still got (quite) annoyed at the bean & her bad behaviors.  i still got frustrated at situations.
i'm not sure *what* i'm supposed to feel...  will butterflies and rainbows follow me overhead now?

the thing that keeps me skeptical is that i already have random bouts of depression.  so maybe i just take this dern pill for 6 months and see if i have any bouts of depression then?  b/c as far as i can tell, that's gonna be my only "tell".

i did have a productive day yesterday.  and am hopeful for a better october in that regard.
so did it affect my motivation??  hard to tell.  maybe.

headache- 0
dry mouth- 0
nausea- 2
insomnia- 0
dizziness- 2

 not sure what i'll tell Dr. New Guy when i meet with him next week.

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