#88 explained

to continue with further explanations (ie: a post idea!)
here's where i give the background of our engagement. (#88 in my 100)

i really never thought The Mr. could surprise me with an engagement. i know that makes no sense, especially now seeing how many surprises he's kept since then.

we had been living together for a year. so i knew that being together all the time would kinda ruin the whole "hey, why not get all fancied up for no reason, no reason at all, but let's go to some place extra special just because" proposal. i mean, really. we aren't the type to just regularly have nice dinners in ATL all the time.

let's rewind a little.
moving in with The Mr. was SUCH a huge deal for me. i really didn't want to, but saw many reasons why i should. it's the catholic guilt & moreso the potter guilt that went with my having to tell my parents that *gack* i'm gonna move in with him.
[and, no. that didn't go very well. but it didn't end our lives or anything, so...]

however, after being together already for 5 1/2 years, i was kinda scared of the whole "why buy the milk....." i remember the night before he hauled my stuff to GA i cried to him & made him promise that he had intentions of marrying me at some point. otherwise, i just didn't think it would make any sense.

of course he did.

so i promised myself that i would right then and there NOT discuss anything having to do with the m word (or the w word) for at least a year. let him do things on his own. i knew his plan was working out. he had wanted to graduate, go to grad school, have a job & establish himself before he'd propose. so i was giving him time to do that.

and i did great!
took weddings and marriage out of my mind. lived our life, blahblahblah.

then it was time to plan a vacation. we were going to go to michigan to see where he was born/lived up until 7th grade. he was raised in detroit, and had family in some areas around there. so we made a vacation out of seeing his haunts in detroit, see family, and travel up to see the sand dunes (abso-f-ing-lutely amazing!) & macinac island, and all kindsa fantastic places en route. it truly was an awesome trip that i still remember fondly. i highly recommend it!

it was right before that trip that i started to have inklings creep into my brain. mainly b/c my friends came to visit us, and i was having a convo with tom about how i just didn't think it would be happening anytime soon. (The Mr. was asleep, so i wasn't hinting here). he predicted it would happen on our trip. he even gave a date. (july 17th)

but really, i wasn't harping on it at all.
until we got there. and not one set, but 2 of the 3 sets of family we saw began to question ME about why we aren't engaged.... more than once.
each time, i answered an appropriate: "ask him!" (they didn't).

and yeah, it came to mind on the 17th. and maybe 2 other times where it was OH SO ROMANTIC.... this would be perfect, pleasepleasepleaseplease.....

the last thing we did there was to go back to his grandmother's. and she lives out in nothingplace. (coincidentally awfully close to tom's small town which i asked her to take us to so i could see the brand new [only] stoplight!)
so on the way back from nothingplace to detroit to catch our flight, we had time to talk. where i told The Mr. that grandma has been asking about the future of us.... both times we saw her. more than once.... hint. hint. let's talk.

so whatever. we talked.
but by then the cat was out of the bag. and i become, um.... rather obsessive. once i get goin, it's hard to stop me. so of course all week long i thought and thought and mulled and cried and fussed about when and whynot and when!?!

i kept bringing it up. and The Mr. would respond. at one point he even said something cryptic (hi! hindsight... i see you now) about maybe by sunday he will be able to tell me how he's feeling.

finally, i'd had ENOUGH of the talk and the thoughts and the sleeplessness and the crabbiness. on that friday i had told my friend on the phone "i'm done. i'd rather be with him and not married than to be without him. so it's fine if he's not ready. i'm done with the obsessing"

friday night- we were engaged!