to continue with further explanations (ie: a post idea!)
here's where i give the background of our engagement. (#88 in my 100)
i really never thought The Mr. could surprise me with an engagement. i know that makes no sense, especially now seeing how many surprises he's kept since then.
we had been living together for a year. so i knew that being together all the time would kinda ruin the whole "hey, why not get all fancied up for no reason, no reason at all, but let's go to some place extra special just because" proposal. i mean, really. we aren't the type to just regularly have nice dinners in ATL all the time.
let's rewind a little.
moving in with The Mr. was SUCH a huge deal for me. i really didn't want to, but saw many reasons why i should. it's the catholic guilt & moreso the potter guilt that went with my having to tell my parents that *gack* i'm gonna move in with him.
[and, no. that didn't go very well. but it didn't end our lives or anything, so...]
however, after being together already for 5 1/2 years, i was kinda scared of the whole "why buy the milk....." i remember the night before he hauled my stuff to GA i cried to him & made him promise that he had intentions of marrying me at some point. otherwise, i just didn't think it would make any sense.
of course he did.
so i promised myself that i would right then and there NOT discuss anything having to do with the m word (or the w word) for at least a year. let him do things on his own. i knew his plan was working out. he had wanted to graduate, go to grad school, have a job & establish himself before he'd propose. so i was giving him time to do that.
and i did great!
took weddings and marriage out of my mind. lived our life, blahblahblah.
then it was time to plan a vacation. we were going to go to michigan to see where he was born/lived up until 7th grade. he was raised in detroit, and had family in some areas around there. so we made a vacation out of seeing his haunts in detroit, see family, and travel up to see the sand dunes (abso-f-ing-lutely amazing!) & macinac island, and all kindsa fantastic places en route. it truly was an awesome trip that i still remember fondly. i highly recommend it!
it was right before that trip that i started to have inklings creep into my brain. mainly b/c my friends came to visit us, and i was having a convo with tom about how i just didn't think it would be happening anytime soon. (The Mr. was asleep, so i wasn't hinting here). he predicted it would happen on our trip. he even gave a date. (july 17th)
but really, i wasn't harping on it at all.
until we got there. and not one set, but 2 of the 3 sets of family we saw began to question ME about why we aren't engaged.... more than once.
each time, i answered an appropriate: "ask him!" (they didn't).
and yeah, it came to mind on the 17th. and maybe 2 other times where it was OH SO ROMANTIC.... this would be perfect, pleasepleasepleaseplease.....
the last thing we did there was to go back to his grandmother's. and she lives out in nothingplace. (coincidentally awfully close to tom's small town which i asked her to take us to so i could see the brand new [only] stoplight!)
so on the way back from nothingplace to detroit to catch our flight, we had time to talk. where i told The Mr. that grandma has been asking about the future of us.... both times we saw her. more than once.... hint. hint. let's talk.
so whatever. we talked.
but by then the cat was out of the bag. and i become, um.... rather obsessive. once i get goin, it's hard to stop me. so of course all week long i thought and thought and mulled and cried and fussed about when and whynot and when!?!
i kept bringing it up. and The Mr. would respond. at one point he even said something cryptic (hi! hindsight... i see you now) about maybe by sunday he will be able to tell me how he's feeling.
finally, i'd had ENOUGH of the talk and the thoughts and the sleeplessness and the crabbiness. on that friday i had told my friend on the phone "i'm done. i'd rather be with him and not married than to be without him. so it's fine if he's not ready. i'm done with the obsessing"
friday night- we were engaged!
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
96 & 97 explained
i thought it might be fun to expound on some of my list of 100. (who am i kidding? i need some ideas)
so, #96 & 97 go somewhat hand-in-hand:
The Mr. & i are about to celebrate our 7th wedding anniversary. we got married in my hometown- columbia, SC, home of the Gamecocks. it happened to be a BIG game weekend. at "home". which seriously pissed off a sister of mine. and caused a ruckus among others. traditionally, the USC/UGA game is pretty big. always competitive. and that was the weekend we had the audacity to get married.
silly us, we consulted our calendars & our ideas of when a nice wedding could be. we took advantage of the brand-new calendar my school system adopted for that year which gave us a week off in september. [incidentally, of the times of year we were looking at marrying, the summer was NOT one of them. i was adamant that my profession shouldn't dictate when i should get married... especially b/c i HATE to be hot. c'mon--- summer wedding in the south? yikes!]
we did not look into local sporting schedules.
had we done that, i bet more of my family would've enjoyed our wedding reception for what it was. and not sat in the hotel bar (with our free booze, i will add) watching carolina play georgia on tv. [i'm not sure... but i think GA won that year. i never really wanted to keep up with knowing. guess i coulda asked my friend who wore his damn earphones during the reception]
had we consulted the carolina home schedule, some of my family members would've been more concerned at the torrential downpour that was occuring (and ruining our plans for post-pictures) in regards to the new bride & groom---instead of how the stadium lost power for a time! oh no! what now??
if we put any thought into football instead of our wedding, i might not have had to defend my song choice to my sister when she came ranting to me (the only time i think we even talked at the reception at all) because we had the NERVE to have the band play "georgia on my mind"... she demanded to know why i would choose such a song! i reminded her that The Mr. & i have now made our home IN GEORGIA. she looked at me, a little dumbstruck and said "huh. oh, ok. that makes sense. i thought you were doing it because of the game". to which i replied (also a little dumbstruck) "nooooo. not everything revolves around football." then i heard her scoff.
if The Mr. & i only wanted to get married some other season, the same crazy sister might not have been featured on the front page of The State newspaper (sunday edition, no doubt!). this was back in the day when Lou Holtz was coaching. apparently, he held some football clinic for women. and of course my sis went. there was a Q&A session, and the reporter thought it'd be great to feature this as front page news...
my sis was in a discussion w/ lou holtz as to why she shouldn't have to be at our wedding. lou made a joke and said it was his understanding only the bride & groom need attend. and she responded how she'd be sure to miss the bouquet toss.
hahahahaha........
thanks, sis.
-----oh, and what burns me up even more??? i was never mentioned by name. so anyone reading that had no idea that a-i was getting married & b- my sister was a putz.
if we had decided to marry some other time, our going-away might have been more traditional. you know, wishing the bride & groom well. maybe make a lude comment or 2 in jest. decorate the car with words that didn't say: "go cocks! UGA sucks". or maybe i could've gotten in the car with my new husband and not witnessed the skirmish between crazy sister & some randomass drunk georgia fan as they are fighting for the window pen. i'm pretty sure some dude wrote something on the car before we could get a chance to drive off.
so, this weekend marks the 7th anniversary of that game!
to which i would like to conclude with:
GO DAWGS!!!
so, #96 & 97 go somewhat hand-in-hand:
The Mr. & i are about to celebrate our 7th wedding anniversary. we got married in my hometown- columbia, SC, home of the Gamecocks. it happened to be a BIG game weekend. at "home". which seriously pissed off a sister of mine. and caused a ruckus among others. traditionally, the USC/UGA game is pretty big. always competitive. and that was the weekend we had the audacity to get married.
silly us, we consulted our calendars & our ideas of when a nice wedding could be. we took advantage of the brand-new calendar my school system adopted for that year which gave us a week off in september. [incidentally, of the times of year we were looking at marrying, the summer was NOT one of them. i was adamant that my profession shouldn't dictate when i should get married... especially b/c i HATE to be hot. c'mon--- summer wedding in the south? yikes!]
we did not look into local sporting schedules.
had we done that, i bet more of my family would've enjoyed our wedding reception for what it was. and not sat in the hotel bar (with our free booze, i will add) watching carolina play georgia on tv. [i'm not sure... but i think GA won that year. i never really wanted to keep up with knowing. guess i coulda asked my friend who wore his damn earphones during the reception]
had we consulted the carolina home schedule, some of my family members would've been more concerned at the torrential downpour that was occuring (and ruining our plans for post-pictures) in regards to the new bride & groom---instead of how the stadium lost power for a time! oh no! what now??
if we put any thought into football instead of our wedding, i might not have had to defend my song choice to my sister when she came ranting to me (the only time i think we even talked at the reception at all) because we had the NERVE to have the band play "georgia on my mind"... she demanded to know why i would choose such a song! i reminded her that The Mr. & i have now made our home IN GEORGIA. she looked at me, a little dumbstruck and said "huh. oh, ok. that makes sense. i thought you were doing it because of the game". to which i replied (also a little dumbstruck) "nooooo. not everything revolves around football." then i heard her scoff.
if The Mr. & i only wanted to get married some other season, the same crazy sister might not have been featured on the front page of The State newspaper (sunday edition, no doubt!). this was back in the day when Lou Holtz was coaching. apparently, he held some football clinic for women. and of course my sis went. there was a Q&A session, and the reporter thought it'd be great to feature this as front page news...
my sis was in a discussion w/ lou holtz as to why she shouldn't have to be at our wedding. lou made a joke and said it was his understanding only the bride & groom need attend. and she responded how she'd be sure to miss the bouquet toss.
hahahahaha........
thanks, sis.
-----oh, and what burns me up even more??? i was never mentioned by name. so anyone reading that had no idea that a-i was getting married & b- my sister was a putz.
if we had decided to marry some other time, our going-away might have been more traditional. you know, wishing the bride & groom well. maybe make a lude comment or 2 in jest. decorate the car with words that didn't say: "go cocks! UGA sucks". or maybe i could've gotten in the car with my new husband and not witnessed the skirmish between crazy sister & some randomass drunk georgia fan as they are fighting for the window pen. i'm pretty sure some dude wrote something on the car before we could get a chance to drive off.
so, this weekend marks the 7th anniversary of that game!
to which i would like to conclude with:
GO DAWGS!!!
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
stranger danger
there's an article on ajc.com today about a 61yo man slapping another woman's (a stranger's) child in a local Wal-Mart. he went up to the lady with the crying 2yo and said, "If you don't shut that baby up, I'll shut her up for you."
and then a few minutes later, that's what he did. he picked her up and slapped her across the face 4 or 5 times. (you can read the article here)**
i shared this info with my friend and we started talking about -first of all---- SERIOUSLY?? O-M-G. but then, would you discipline another's kid?
i would have no problem with someone disciplining thelittlebean. if she needs disciplining. if she's getting into something or bothering your kid and i'm not around (really? when am i not around??) i'd have no problem with your telling her to cut it out. or solving the problem by taking away whatever's the cause.
i wouldn't expect anyone to cross the taboo line of spanking with another child. since that's such a hot-button issue anyway, it's likely you have a differing opinion than that of your friend.
i know when i taught for 7 years, i had no problem disciplining other students. if you are running in the hall, it's still not OK even if your teacher's not around. or if i see that you're starting to tell my 1st grade student that there's not a santa claus- you bet i'll say something to you about that... you just can't go 'round ruining kids' lives and dreams!!
i can't believe that man in the article, though. i mean- it's kinda sad to think he's so wound up right now that he couldn't stop himself before he crossed such a line. nobody likes to hear the babies cry in Wal-Mart (or wherever).... least of all that mom! but WOW. to haul off and smack a kid. in front of the mom. instead of just leaving the store? or rolling your eyes? or even mumbling loudly under your breath.
in a time where you can get in trouble for publicly spanking your own kid, he really risked a lot to make such a statement.
i'm sure many out there would say we don't have the right to 'parent' a kid who's acting up. and then there are those out there who say "it takes a village..."
what do YOU think?
**if you clicked on the article, then you saw the picture of Mr. Scowly-McScowlerson. it's hard not to wonder if this is the first time he's done something like this.
and then a few minutes later, that's what he did. he picked her up and slapped her across the face 4 or 5 times. (you can read the article here)**
i shared this info with my friend and we started talking about -first of all---- SERIOUSLY?? O-M-G. but then, would you discipline another's kid?
i would have no problem with someone disciplining thelittlebean. if she needs disciplining. if she's getting into something or bothering your kid and i'm not around (really? when am i not around??) i'd have no problem with your telling her to cut it out. or solving the problem by taking away whatever's the cause.
i wouldn't expect anyone to cross the taboo line of spanking with another child. since that's such a hot-button issue anyway, it's likely you have a differing opinion than that of your friend.
i know when i taught for 7 years, i had no problem disciplining other students. if you are running in the hall, it's still not OK even if your teacher's not around. or if i see that you're starting to tell my 1st grade student that there's not a santa claus- you bet i'll say something to you about that... you just can't go 'round ruining kids' lives and dreams!!
i can't believe that man in the article, though. i mean- it's kinda sad to think he's so wound up right now that he couldn't stop himself before he crossed such a line. nobody likes to hear the babies cry in Wal-Mart (or wherever).... least of all that mom! but WOW. to haul off and smack a kid. in front of the mom. instead of just leaving the store? or rolling your eyes? or even mumbling loudly under your breath.
in a time where you can get in trouble for publicly spanking your own kid, he really risked a lot to make such a statement.
i'm sure many out there would say we don't have the right to 'parent' a kid who's acting up. and then there are those out there who say "it takes a village..."
what do YOU think?
**if you clicked on the article, then you saw the picture of Mr. Scowly-McScowlerson. it's hard not to wonder if this is the first time he's done something like this.
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